Thinking...of...sunshine...

This weekend I have been thinking alot about how I make my life better. I have made a lot of positive choices in the past few weeks and I see the rewards from them. If I stay on the path I am on I am sure to be better than I was yesterday.
When it comes to a love life I am taking things slowly. One thing I have realized is that any guy can be prince charming. It takes all the mistakes we make in order to change a man to be better than he was before. I want to be the best I can be and wish I find someone who wants to be loved and cared for. My last dating relationship definitely showed me what I am not looking for. I do like independence in a woman but not to the degree that they don't want to be a part of my life on a daily basis. I am also looking for a lady who enjoys spending time with me and my kids. I am not sure what brought on this tangent but I am feeling very chipper this last week with all of the sunshine! Until next time...

Ava's birthday...

My baby girl is 5 yrs old as of yesterday. She has been the light of my life since she was born. She is just like her dad in so many ways except for beauty. Who knows where that came from? She is so curious about everything and that is what I love so much. It is like seeing myself at her age with all the curiosity. I know I got into a lot of trouble because of my wondering ways...but that is why I know as much as I do now about things. Her birthday is going to be this weekend and it should be fun. We are having her party and going skating at Holiday skate in Elkhart. I hope the rest of this week goes well and I hope you all have a great week as well! Until next time...

There will always be sad, sad days...

It is official the wonderful girl I was dating without titles has officially ended our dating relationship. I didn't realize how much I cared about her until she said something. I feel like balling my eyes out but I know that this is for the best in the long run. She is an amazing girl and I wouldn't change anything about the relationship we had except I would tell her I cared about her more and I would show her the poems I wrote for her. Now she will never see them and that makes me sad. She cooked an amazing dinner tonight. We had Alfredo bow tie pasta with scallops and shrimp and squash, yellow and zucchini. If my mom knew I ate scallops or squash she'd scream...lol. I learned a ton from her and I wish her the best in life. I know we will remain friends and that is great. If she is reading this she knows I care about her and she will always have a special place in my heart. Thanks for ending this the right way. I have the most admiration and respect for you!

To everyone who reads this I wish I knew who you were and thanks for reading. This is definitely a way for me to calm myself down and think about things. Plus maybe one day I will get to write a book and this is a way for me to train myself a little. All I know is that in this life it is short and we need to live life to fullest. To have never loved is as if to have never existed at all. I am pretty sure I read that somewhere else but I feel that way about life. I end this night with sadness but tomorrow begins a new day...a new chapter in my life. I wouldn't change many pages in my book except the ones where I hurt people. Good Night!

Working...working...working!

Work has been going by really slow this week and I am not sure why. We do seem less busy than normal this week. I guess that can be good because we all need a break from the norm. I am really excited about the upcoming weekend! Not sure what is going on for sure but I am excited! Last weekend was a blast as well got to see some old friends and hope I get to see them again soon! If anyone wants to do anything this weekend I am game! Hope everyone has a great rest of the week!

I am excited because I just figured out a way to see what is happening at my house using a webcam. Kind of a surveillance camera if you may. It is really cool! Thanks to Kim Komando for the daily download! Check out her site if you have any computer related issues. She is the best!

I will post more again sometime this week! TTYL!

I decided to sign up for mobile blogging. This is just a test for me to see if i actually set this up right! Here goes nothing. Lol.

Work week finished...Martins #12 reunion tomorrow

With my work week finished it brings up so many opportunities to get into trouble...I am looking forward to the Martins #12 reunion get together tomorrow night. I hope a lot of people come to it! It will be nice to see everyone from back in the day! It is crazy for me to think I have spent almost as long at my current job as I did at Martins! I was at Martins for six years! Amber is watching the kids for me tomorrow and she seemed very reluctant to do so. You would think after almost 3 months of not seeing her kids she would want to get as much time with them as possible. Amber found out she doesn't have a job today and that is kind of scary. With this job market and how long it took her before to find a job I hope she can get something quick. The problem was she wouldn't apply for a job just anywhere. She had to find something in the medical/mental health field. Her boyfriend is laid off and now she doesn't have a job as well. Please pray for her and her family as they sort out what is happening right now!

What is great about today I took off work a few hours early to enjoy the beautiful sunshine and then I took a nap! That was what I needed because I had a bad headache and was afraid I was getting sick but the nap seemed to do the trick! Hoping to have a great night, tonight and tomorrow! I will try to update after the reunion tomorrow night but who knows for sure!

Overwhelmed...

I am feeling extremely overwhelmed with everything going on right now. The funny thing is most of the stuff I am dealing with is just normal everyday occurrences. I have shut off my phone updates for Facebook for awhile and I have also shut off my Twitter updates. I am going to see if these things help a little. I am starting to focus on what I feel is important in my life. My kids will always be #1 on that list. Last night the kids wouldn't go to bed and it really frustrated me and I don't ever feel that way. I am not completely sure everything that is happening is all in my head or if there is some physical component as well. Please pray for me as I take this journey in figuring out what need to do to feel less overwhelmed and more in control of my life.

Crazy month...Great Weekend!

I know it has been awhile since I last posted. It has been an amazingly fast month. I can't believe we are over half way through February already. This weekend was pretty awesome! Had a great time going to Chicago with Hannah and her family! I went up to the Skydeck on the Willis Tower(formerly Sears Tower) and was 103 stories above the ground. I also went ice skating in Downtown Chicago! It was very difficult for me to keep my balance but I never fell. We ate at Giordano's pizza...some of the best stuffed pizza I have ever had! Chicago was a blast and hope to have more excursions to the windy city!

Valentine's day was really nice as well! I took Hannah out to eat at Soho Japanese Bistro. We both have been wanting to go since it opened. She had scallops and filet mignon and I had Steak, Chicken, and Shrimp. We also had Eel to eat and Avocado wraps. It turns out eel doesn't taste bad at all. After dinner we decided to go see "Valentine's Day." It was a cute movie and I recommend seeing it with someone special! This year has been a great year so far on me trying new things. I tried eel, went to the top of the tallest building in America, went ice skating, ate broccoli, ate scallops, ate tomatoes, kiwi, mushrooms. Well lets just say it has been an exciting year so far!

My V-day didn't end as I expected...Ava ended up having to go to the ER because she got glue in her eyes from the mouse traps at her mom's house. I guess when it says keep out of reach of children on the box maybe people should heed that order. I had to drive to Meijer in order to find what type of adhesive it is and if it had any harmful chemicals besides the adhesive. I am sure she will be fine because the nurses know what brand the traps are now. It kind of bothered me when I found out Ava went to the ER. I definitely was struggling to stay focused on the task at hand. It was very noticeable to me and difficult for me to concentrate on just one thing. Good Night all! Have a great week!

Bed time...

I went to put my kids to bed last night and I almost started crying because I realized I won't have them to put to bed for almost a week. I have taken care of them since Halloween and the time flew by so quick that I didn't realize it was going back to the norm so soon. I am going to miss putting them to bed. I might have a drink and go to bed early tonight. I will be all alone again in my house. Kind of sad to think about but overall it could be nice to just relax without worrying about them. I am hoping I get to spend time with some friends I haven't seen in awhile and also hoping I get to make some new friends to. I am looking ahead to the weekend when I don't have to work. I hope all of you reading this have a wonderful week. I am praying for the people of Haiti and I hope everyone else is to. Good Night all!

Big Weekend...maybe!

This will be the first weekend since Halloween I have not had my kids. It is definitely a strange feeling to have an entire weekend to myself. Amber is taking the kids to Cincinnati to see her sister. To bad my new schedule begins on Monday and so I will only have a 2 day weekend. I am hoping to do something real fun this weekend but it can't be expensive because I am broke! Also during the week I won't see them but I still have to work like normal. I won't have to get up as early so I may go out during the week to see what is happening in this town!

I went to the doctor on Friday and she told me I still have an ear infection. I haven't been able to hear out of my right ear for over 5 weeks now! It has been an adjustment for me to listen only with one ear. I now have ear drops and pills. This is the third round of antibiotics I will have been on. I am hoping this round does the trick! That is about all that is new with me for now! I will try to keep this updated as much as I can!

Please keep me in your prayers as I journey through life!

2010 a new year!

It has been crazy the past ten days. A lot has happened with Amber. As of yesterday my kids have a new sister named Olivia. She was 5lbs 14oz. She was born at only 34 weeks gestation. So she was a big girl for her age in womb. She seems healthy and has not been in the NICU at all. Amber told me today she was planning on taking the kids on her days from now on so my adventure in full time single parenting seems to be over. I am excited to finally have time to spend with people and don't always have to juggle my kids around in order to do so. One thing I have learned is that I am definitely more understanding of people who raise kids being single. Whether it be through divorce. death, or just getting knocked up by a loser it is difficult to raise kids by yourself.

It may be awhile beteween my responses because I no longer have the internet at home. I have deemed it not something I need to survive.

About that girl I am seeing...there is something about her kiss. It intoxicates me. If she reads this she already knows she is special. Here is to hoping 2010 is a year with great memories and lots of fun.